Get off your BUTT!

So what's up with this? Why won't Orangeboy ask for help or make the right person aware of his needs? It's not that he never asks for help or expresses a need. He's learned to do that in many circumstances. He has made progress from his preschooler days when he wouldn't answer even the simplest question and seemed utterly incapable of making a personal choice or having an opinion. These days he is actually rather opinionated - about clothing, food, temperature, movies, games, noise levels, and so forth; but he STILL has this tendency to not speak up and just SAY that he needs something or ASK for something.
If he needs more drink or a spoon or a place to sit - he won't say, "Where should I sit?" or "Could I please have some more lemonade?" or "I need a spoon for this."
Instead he will whine or make frustration noises until I'm like, "What!?"

But now there is something even more perplexing and frustrating. He has been out of notebook paper for several days, maybe longer, and he didn't say a word about it. His little SISTER has to tell me. She knew because he has been borrowing paper from her in Challenge class. So she finally tells me. He's right there when she does and he doesn't even pipe up to confirm or deny that he is out of paper and has been. He just hangs his head.
What's even more puzzling is that I have a cabinet of school and project supplies that has been stocked that way for two years now. I have made a point of showing him what's in the cabinet and overtly telling him that if he needs markers, notebook paper, construction paper, ruler, scissors, computer paper... that he can get them from that cabinet. He didn't even bother to do that!
He can borrow paper from his sister for days on end, but can't go to the cabinet and get some to reload his notebook with!?
He can't even say, "Mom, I'm out of paper?"
What's up with that!?! Am I some kind of fearsome ogre that will beat his head off if he asks for any concessions? NO.
He has to let his sister be his spokesperson? Yes. I have talked to both of them about this before. She comes and tells me stuff on his behalf. I have told her that she is not to act as his spokesmodel. He has to get rich and famous before he can have one of those.
Anyway, when she tells me he has been out of paper for awhile, he says nothing about it to me and doesn't ask if I can give him some more, he just groans. THEN he turns to his sister and mutters, "Well, how did YOU get more paper?"

Can you believe that?

And guess what sweet little sister replies?
"I got off my BUTT and got some!"

You gotta love that.


  1. I'm really bad at this sort of thing, too. For me, I don't think it is as much a communication problem as it is executive dysfunction. Does Orange Boy get any help (from the school or in therapy) with executive functioning?

  2. Not really - not from the school. He does take Concerta for ADHD, which helps him A LOT. It isn't the perfect or only solution of course.


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