On a grocery run with the kids this week, I was still feeling the holiday spirit and let my oldest son, the master negotiator, talk me into buying each child a gourmet lollipop. The lollipops were right there in the checkout impulse-buy section, looking appealingly like large colorful superballs on sticks. So each of us, including me, picked out an exotic flavor. Two kids opened their lollipops as soon as they got in the car, but Orangeboy discovered an unopened sucker that was in the car from an earlier bank run and opened that free one, instead of the one I had just paid 50 cents for.
As I was pulling out of my parking space, I spotted him in the backseat licking the little flat, bank sucker and questioned his choice. He replied that he was "saving" the other one.
This prompted me to sarcasm once again and I ventured, "So I guess you've decided that it's too special to eat and so you might as well waste it."
Orangeboy's response: "Well... pretty much."
So here's where I must explain the history of Orangeboy and saving stuff. His "saving" is really, I believe, I mild form of hoarding. Early in his life, if he was given a gift, no matter how token, he would carry it about on his person as long as he was allowed. Once he was forced into the position of having to let something go, he would stash it somewhere; like in a corner behind a door, or under a bed, or in the bread box. I once found 5 pairs of sunglasses in the breadbox. I had been so frustrated about where all his sunglasses were going!
He still has the tendency to take anything he values or that is deemed special in some way, and "stash" it in his room. It may not be seen for a long, long time - even if it WAS something edible.
During the previous holiday week, my brother, sister-in-law, and their daughter came to visit. We exchanged gifts with them and the grands one evening at the grandparents' house. Orangeboy stacked each gift that he opened on his lap as he opened them. When the gift exchange session was over, he stood up with his stack and started wandering about. I informed him that we weren't going anywhere right away and he could put his stuff down. He looked uncertain about that and decided not to take me up on the unburdening idea. I finally had to just take the gifts away and put them near the door, assuring him that they were going nowhere but home with us when we were ready.
So, all of this history, in addition to the fact that he still has a bag full of Halloween candy in his closet, prompted me to snipe that he was going to save the gourmet lollipop until it was wasted.
And he agreed.
You've just described me.ReplyDelete
When I was in college, my then-boyfriend/now-husband brought me some cheese from Wisconsin that was covered in cow-shaped wax.
I put it on a shelf because it was cute. It was less cute weeks later when it started oozing liquid.
Lesson learned. I still wish I'd just eaten the cheese.
Ohhhh, I totally do that same saving thing, and I do think it is hoarding. I hoard in other ways, too. The gift stuff is interesting -- that I don't do (and don't think I ever have).ReplyDelete
You know, today's Talk of the Nation was all about collecting, bordering on hoarding. It really struck a chord with me. You might enjoy listening to it, too. Here it is, if you're interested.
Thanks, Quirky Mom.ReplyDelete
Stimey, I myself have many regrets associated with cheese.
On the flipside, I'm one of those annoying minimalists who hates knick-knacks and cleans out closets when I'm upset.
I remeber saving this parrot, choc foil wraped. My mum and you are way better than me. Thankfully Egg doesn't do this..the halloween candy would not be safe with this mama! *puts on witch from Wizard of OZ voice" And his gourmet lolly pop too".ReplyDelete
Followed a link to you site from A Different Nest. I love this post.ReplyDelete
My son does the same thing, only he trusts us to put it in a special place for him and not allow a soul to touch it. Ironically, it's usually suckers. However, since the addition of his 2 year old sister and her sucker-eating self, he has decided that there are times when eating them rather than collecting them and parading them around as a "sucker balloon bouquet" would be best.
I've been thinking of this post the last few days. The last slice of the banana bread we made last week is still wrapped up on my kitchen counter. I asked Hubby to save it for me, because I hadn't gotten much, and that was a few days ago. I just haven't eaten it. Why do I do this?ReplyDelete
QM: Well, I'm no PsyD, but I think for Orangeboy it probably has a basis in controlling things. Holding onto and saving stuff is a way to have control over those things. Controlling special and valuable things is more powerful. He has so few things that make him feel in control and powerful.ReplyDelete
Hey China, this is non post related, but the other week I let Egg chose his own cereal at the shop. He chose weetabix minis which were honey nut flavoured, anyway I gave myself a bowel and thought of Orangeboy!! They were still hard at the end of eating, might be worth a try if you can buy them over there, here is a picture. :0)ReplyDelete
QM, Eggs dad used to get grief of his parents when he was younger about eating the last of things so now as an adult he will always leave things, like the last piece of ham in the packet, in our house he would have been lucky to get ANY banana bread with me in the house :0)